Fans rejoiced at the news that their favorite boy wizard was coming back for a new sequel in the play Harry Potter and the Cursed Child, but social justice warriors were enraged that the franchise is just not gay enough.
Vox published a pearl-clutching, asthma attack-inducing, article to respond to the trigger warning of too many straight white characters.
“…almost 20 years after the publication of the very first Harry Potter book, the world of Harry Potter still looks and feels exactly like it did when Harry first entered Hogwarts: nearly all white and rigidly heteronormative.”
Straight and white! It’s like a literary Klan meeting!
Social justice warriors insist that new Harry Potter spinoffs should better reflect its readership: young, multiracial, progressive, and gender fluid.
They’re especially mad that Harry’s son in the Cursed Child isn’t gay, even though he has a bromance with Draco Malfoy’s son.
A gay Potter fan named Jack Chellman wrote in The Huffington Post that The Cursed Child is basically 95 percent a romance story with the characters saying “no homo” at the very end.
The Daily Dot argued that if the play had been written by fans they would have made Potter and Malfoy queer, and the real version is a major loss for readers and playgoers.
These social justice millennials are heartbroken by the fact that the author may have crafted a great non-sexual male love story that doesn’t pass their ideological smell test.
While I haven’t read The Cursed Child and am no fan the Potter book series, I do know something about being disappointed by the ending of a book or movie. If I had my way: Leonardo DiCaprio would have lived at the end The Departed, Tom Robinson would have gone free in To Kill a Mockingbird, and Anakin Skywalker would have killed Jar Jar Binks before killing all those kid jedis.
The point is that it’s not the author’s job to give the reader everything they want, and social justice warriors cannot embrace the fact that there are great same-sex love stories that don’t involve sexuality: Thelma and Louise, The Old Testament’s Jonathan and David, Cory and Shawn from Boy Meets World, Frodo and Sam of Lord of the Rings, and Andy and Red from Shawshank Redemption.
It’s possible that all of these stories as well as the Cursed Child are better because of the characters’ deep love for one another but lack of sexual desire. Ending a story with sharing a bed pales in comparison to the impact and relatability of the journey that ends with boys becoming men.