SNL depicts Mitt Romney drowning his sorrows in milk following election defeat

Even though he lost the election, NBC‘s SNL thinks former governor Mitt Romney will be fine — after he drowns his sorrows in gallons of milk.

This week’s cold open of “Saturday Night Live” features the GOP presidential candidate standing on the balcony of his home on election night. Romney, played by Jason Sudeikis, sulks about his defeat in a reserved way, on account of his Mormon faith. “Darn it all,” he says before chugging some milk from a carton.

“I still love you America, I do,” fake Romney says. “But you’ve hurt my feelings very, very much.”

Romney is joined at different intervals by various people, including his wife Ann, three of his sons — Tagg, Matt and Josh, all played by Taran Killam — and Karl Rove.

The highlights of the cold open poke fun at a long campaign season fraught with political drama. Tagg threatens to punch America in the face, alluding to the eldest son’s comment about wanting to hit President Obama. Rove, played by Bobby Moynihan, tells Romney he thinks he could still win Ohio, poking fun at the conservative commentator’s meltdown on FOX News.

Matt tries to convince his dad to come inside to watch Paul Ryan do “feats of strength in the drawing room.” “Well I’d like to see him carry Wisconsin!” fake Romney shouts. During the election, Romney lost every swing state except North Carolina — including Wisconsin, the home state of his running mate.

Josh Romney tells his dad to come back into the house because Donald Trump “is doing a very amusing thing where he’s racist.”

Ultimately, SNL seems to think Romney will survive his defeat. At the end of the cold open, Ann, played by Kate McKinnon, comes back out onto the balcony with her husband. “I’m going to be very, very sick tomorrow,” Romney says, after telling Ann he’s had ten gallons of milk. “But I’m also going to be OK, because I have you.” The shot narrows to a heart around the two, and words on the screen read “Mitt & Ann Forever.”

While it may be the end of the road for Sudeikis’ role as Romney, the former Massachusetts governor will keep on trucking.

Comments

Comments

  1. tyler says:

    As a person pays a great deal of concentration on this stuff, I can confirm this article is absolutely right.

Polititainment

Bill Clinton, Usher fundraiser for Dem

In the latest instance of Democrat-celebrity coupling, former President Bill Clinton and singer Usher will join forces at a September 13 fundraiser for Democratic candidate for Senate in Georgia Michelle Nunn.

Eric Roberts: Bush killed James Foley

Actor Eric Roberts on Twitter Monday accused former President George W. Bush of killing American journalist James Foley, who was beheaded by an ISIS terrorist in a video posted to YouTube in August.

Palin asks fans to pray for Joan Rivers
Sarah Palin and her daughter Bristol are asking their fans to show support for comedian Joan Rivers, an unlikely pal of the Palins. Rivers,81, has been unconscious in the hospital since Thursday after she went into cardiac arrest during a procedure. Palin posted on her popular Facebook page Friday directing fans to a blog post by Bristol. […]
Grover Norquist loved Burning Man
It’s official: Grover Norquist absolutely loved this year’s Burning Man festival. Before the blaze with co-founder of Burning Man Larry Harvey.He has created a wonderful festival/movement/Brigadoon pic.twitter.com/3iq5UzcPYG — Grover Norquist (@GroverNorquist) August 31, 2014 Burning Man. 65,000 participants. 1000s of works of art. Anyone who walks through BM and only notices nudity tells you only […]
Celebs gin up youth votes for midterms
THE HILL – With young voters more apathetic about voting and government than ever, several organizations are trying to woo the “selfie generation” to the polls this fall. “About half of those who vote in presidential elections do not vote in midterms,” explained Andy Bernstein, executive director of HeadCount, a non-partisan organization that partners with musicians […]

White House

Obama notifies Congress of airstrikes in Iraq
WASHINGTON (AP) — President Barack Obama has sent official notification to Congress of his order for last week’s airstrikes and humanitarian aid drops to help Iraqis threatened by Islamic State militants. The White House on Monday released a letter formally letting Congress’ leaders know that Obama approved the mission that repelled Sunni fighters in the northern Shiite […]
Obama: The world seems really messy because of ‘social media’

President Barack Obama, speaking at yet another fundraiser with a script that's been recycled more than a Hollywood romantic comedy, had an unlikely culprit for the world's problems.

White House scrambles to control the fallout from Obama’s ‘We don’t have a strategy yet’ comment
It’s hard to imagine that there was any other reaction than full panic from White House staffers after President Obama uttered a fateful gaffe Thursday afternoon, “We don’t have a strategy yet.” The line quickly exploded on Twitter and on television — though not quite as much as the president’s tan suit — as it […]
GOP: ‘He’s not a king’
THE HILL – Whether lamenting the so-called vacationer-in-chief’s swing of a golf club or criticizing his handling of the healthcare rollout, Republicans are getting in the habit of comparing President Obama to a monarch. “It’s one thing after another. You know he says he has no choice but to act. He says he has a pen […]
Obama’s Democratic fundraising just might ruin Labor Day weekend for the rest of us

Barely having returned from a 15-day vacation on Martha's Vineyard, Massachusetts, Obama will spend is Labor Day weekend traveling to support his Democratic friends. The problem is, this means that Americans planning to take seaplanes to East Hampton, Montauk, Martha's Vineyard or Nantucket won't be able to travel themselves.

Congress

Dem candidate: Republicans 'worse than ISIL'

Jesse Smith, a Democrat running for Alabama's 3rd Congressional district, compared Republicans to ISIL (or ISIS) militants on Twitter Monday, asserting that the GOP is "worse" than the terrorists that have wreaked havoc in Syria and Iraq.

When Congress was popular
THE HILL — If you’re not a paid staffer or blood relative, as the joke goes, you probably hate Congress. The institution is so unpopular that voters were more positive about brussels sprouts, head lice and root canals in one recent survey. But there have been a handful of times over the last 100 years […]
Cruz highlights issues for 2014, 2016 elections
Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas) elicited huge cheers from the audience at the Americans For Prosperity’s “Defending the American Dream Summit” Saturday when he vowed Republicans would take back control of the U.S. Senate and “retire” Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid. “I’m convinced we’re going to win in 2014 and 2016 is going to be even better,” […]
IRS says Lerner's Blackberry 'destroyed'

A senior IRS lawyer has said in a sworn declaration that Lois Lerner's BlackBerry was intentionally destroyed after Congress had begun to investigate her involvement in IRS targeting of conservative groups.

Youth impact reason enough to pass jobs bills
The U.S. House Committee on Ways and Means is in the midst of releasing 40 reasons over the course of 40 days that the Senate should take up the 40 jobs bills the House has already passed. While most of their reasons have focused on general unemployment and economic growth statistics, they turned their attention […]