After current President Barack Obama seemed to be unable to get it together during Wednesday nights’ debate, his loyal supporters and media allies came up with the most likely reasons why he just fizzled. Here are our top five:
1. Romney was lying, that’s why he was more articulate. To find this one, just check out the front banner of The Huffington Post, which claims that, “Romney won because he abandoned any pretense of honesty.” Maybe they got that headline from the e-mail sent out by the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee (DCCC) on Wednesday night claiming, “Mitt Romney just went on that debate stage and lied to the American people.” Presumably then the reason why Obama seemed unconvincing and inarticulate in comparison was because he was stuck in the rut of genuine honesty and unable to ignore his moral compass in order to win the debate.
2. Obama just wasn’t prepared because he hadn’t been watching enough MSNBC. Well, that was Chris Matthews’ only explanation for the President’s apparent fiasco on Wednesday. “We have our knives out,” Matthews said after the debate, referring to MSNBC’s support of the Obama campaign. admitting his network is trying their best to defend Obama and his policies. “We go after the people and the facts,” Matthews said. “What was he doing tonight? He went in there disarmed.” At least if this is the problem, there’s an easy solution. Next time he should just sit down with Matthews and Rachel Maddow and run through what he is going to say before he heads out there.
3. The altitude in Denver was too much for Obama. At least that is what science expert Al Gore thought was to blame for Obama’s poor debate performance. “I’m going to say something controversial here,” Gore told Current TV. “Obama arrived in Denver at 2 p.m. today, just a few hours before the debate started. Romney did his debate prep in Denver. When you go to 5,000 feet and you only have a few hours to adjust — I don’t know.” Which is funny because Obama gave his 2008 DNC speech there and hit the ball out of the park, no pun intended. Maybe it’s global warming.
4. Obama was just a victim of Romney’s “shenanigans.” The DCCC changed their tune this morning after maybe deciding that the “Romney lying” tactic wasn’t working and decided to blame all of Obama’s failures on Romney’s “shenanigans.” “I’ve had just about enough of Romney’s shenanigans,” the e-mail reads. “My friends at the DCCC are trying to put up a big number tonight to show how hard we’re going to fight back against the Republicans.” Darn those rascally shenanigans, you just can’t get past them sometimes.
5. Everyone just has it wrong, Obama really did win the debate. That’s the line Vice President Joe Biden is using! ”If you finished watching the debate like I did, I am sure you are as proud of President Obama as I am,” Biden told his supporters in a video. He also tweeted Wednesday night right after the debate, “Folks, I hope you saw what I saw tonight: President Obama’s the choice to move us forward, not back. –Joe.” Well thanks Joe, but did you watch it? Maybe he’s just hoping that he’ll get the same kind of mercy when he has to face Republican Vice Presidential candidate Paul Ryan next week.