The 2014 '30 Under 30'

Congrats to this year's 30 -- check out the full list here!

DWS Weighs in With Her Own Definitive List of Women’s ‘Priorities’

Last weekend, Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz (D-Fla.), the Democratic National Committee Chairwoman, appeared on CNN’s State of the Union. and said “The focus of the Republican Party on turning back the clock for women …(it) shows how callous and insensitive they are towards women’s priorities.”  Let’s take a look at what DWS believes are the priorities of women over the last couple of months.

DWS thinks that women care desperately about contraception, even if it violates religious beliefs. She was a veritable fangirl for Georgetown Law student Sandra Fluke, and became even more fervent after Rush Limbaugh used an ill-chosen word to describe her.

Conclusion: A priority for women is free contraception from any establishment.

Another DWS-approved priority of women is not having feelings hurt. This only refers to conservatives, as she went on Bill Maher’s show after he said much worse. We know DWS doesn’t accept the “funny” defense.

Conclusion: A priority for women is outrage over hurt feelings, but only if hurt by conservatives.

All Americans are worried about the economy. DWS feels our pain! She knows that we are concerned about the economy, and Republicans just don’t understand.

But then, there are those pesky, inconvenient facts, which she constantly has to “correct” by lying. These facts are especially awkward when it comes to women. Women have been hit disproportionately hard as we teeter on the brink of economic collapse, but that is not a priority.

Conclusion: A priority for women is focus on the troubled economy, but only when she can argue the Right is at fault. Obama’s abysmal track record is something women with which women are not concerned.

Women are about being able to “choose.” DWS was even called a heroine by Planned Parenthood. A woman is attacked for choosing to stay home to raise her children? Not so heroic. One of her advisers, Hilary Rosen, set off a firestorm by saying that Ann Romney (who has raised five sons, beat breast cancer and is battling MS) has never worked a day in her life. Then she didn’t back down.

Women everywhere were genuinely outraged. Where was DWS? Making the media rounds on this issue? Nope. Instead, at noon the next day, she tweeted “Disappointed in @hilaryr ‘s comments. As a mother of 3 there’s no doubt that raising children is work.” That was the absolute minimum admonishment she could have mustered. Then she changed the subject.

Her next tweet read “Almost all the women @MittRomney‘s trotting out to defend his record on women voted against [the] Lilly Ledbetter [Fair Pay Act of 2009] and fair pay.”

This interesting attempt at distraction doesn’t stand up to scrutiny. It recently came to light that the White House pays women less than men, and I missed her outrage.

Conclusion: A priority for women is making choices of which DWS approves. Another priority is equal pay under certain circumstances, but this can be waived if DWS digs the employer.

We can draw a few conclusions as to the overall priorities of women as seen by DWS.

The top priority of American women is to avoid children. First by contraception, then by abortion. If you are unfortunate enough to have a child, please, by all means, get a real job.

We can also conclude that women prioritize focus on the economy. We are concerned about unemployment and equal wages to the extent that Republicans are to blame. Women do not care about what the Democratic Party has done to their pocketbooks.

Women care about being judged or called names by conservatives only.

All of these work towards toward DWS’ ultimate objective, the top of priority of women according to DWS: A second term for Barack Obama.

 

Comments

Polititainment

Obama channels Chris Rock

Discussing a tax loophole that businesses exploit in order to avoid paying United States taxes, the president made a distinction between that which isn't right and that which just "ain't right."

Colbert mocks Palin for Internet channel

In an attempt to mock Sarah Palin for her recently launched Internet television channel, Stephen Colbert on Tuesday's episode of "The Colbert Report" introduced his own competing web show called "Stephen Colbert's Angry Echo Chamber."

Fallon imagines President Biden
During his show Tuesday night, Jimmy Fallon took a look at the pros and  cons of a potential Joe Biden presidency. He left it to the viewers to decide, but pointed out some critical flaws to putting Biden in the Oval Office. “Pro: for Secretary of State, he’ll pick someone who is fluent in several […]
Jon Stewart ridicules John Kerry

Jon Stewart on "The Daily Show" Monday made fun of U.S. Secretary of State John Kerry for his inability to negotiate a ceasefire between Israel and Hamas after a 12-hour ceasefire between the two expired.

'True Blood' star takes on Sarah Palin

Kristin Bauer van Straten, who plays vampire Pam Ravenscroft on the HBO program, hit back at the former governor of Alaska for criticizing a recent episode.

White House

New emails reveal Lois Lerner talked way too much smack about right wing on official phone

An email exchange between Lois Lerner and an unnamed individual made public Wednesday reveals that the former IRS official doesn't care too much for talk radio.

Fact check needed on Obama’s Kansas City speech, states with minimum wage increases didn’t see higher job growth
It’s time for a fact check on the president’s latest proclamation about the need for an increase to the minimum wage. President Barack Obama continued his tour across America Wednesday with a speech on the economy in Kansas City, Miss. and meals with more letter writers. Per usual, Obama brought up his attempts to bring […]
Golfer finds Obama’s golf ball in the woods, says president’s game is ‘off line’
President Barack Obama is “off line again.” Or at least his golf game appears to be. Instagram user larrydoh posted a picture of a Titleist 44 golf ball labeled “POTUS” on Saturday. He found the golf ball at the Congressional Country Club, one day after POTUS played the same course himself. “Obama played at Congressional […]
Polls: Obama White House incompetent at managing, worse than Darth Vader

The job of the administrative branch is to, well, administer the laws. According to a new Fox News poll released on Wednesday, most Americans think that the Obama administration is failing dismally at the task.

Obama wants ‘idealism and optimism’ for millennials in face of Congressional ‘crisis,’ refuses to recognize he is part of the problem
Now that “hope and change” seems to be played out, President Barack Obama has come up with a new catchphrase for millennials – “idealism and optimism.” In a speech at a Democratic National Convention fundraiser in Seattle, Wash. Tuesday night, Obama asked young people not to give up their natural idealism and optimism because of […]

Congress

DWS admits Obama is not doing his job
We never thought we would say this, but Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz just said something we actually agree with. Moments before the House vote on a lawsuit against President Barack Obama, Schultz appeared on MSNBC and admitted that Obama hasn’t been doing his job. “I’m going to go to the House floor and actually debate why […]
Cruz provides motivation to youth in speech

Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas) provided motivation to an audience of students from across the country Tuesday, saying that young people have been behind almost “every significant change” in human history.

Boehner calls impeachment talk a Democrat 'scam'
Politicians from both parties have been talking a lot about the “I-word” — impeachment. Although everyone from Harry Reid to Sarah Palin has mentioned impeachment, Speaker John Boehner (R-Ohio) made it clear Tuesday that House Republicans don’t intend to impeach. “This whole talk about impeachment is coming from the president’s own staff — and coming from Democrats […]
Rand Paul and Cory Booker continue their bromance
Senators Rand Paul (R-Ky) and Cory Booker (D-N.J.) have formed a bipartisan bromance in the U.S. Senate. Now, they’ve taken it to Twitter. Both senators were honored as one of the The Hill’s 2014 50 most beautiful list, which was released Tuesday. Paul wasted no time extending congratulations to Booker via Twitter. Congrats to my […]
GOP Rep introduces marijuana medical oil bill
A Republican congressman announced a bill Monday that would legalize therapeutic hemp and a marijuana oil for medical use. The Charlotte’s Web Medical Hemp Act of 2014, introduced by Rep. Scott Perry (R-Pa.), would remove cannabidiol (CBD) oil and therapeutic hemp from the federal definition of marijuana. Anecdotal evidence has shown that children with severe seizure disorders […]