The 2014 '30 Under 30'

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Jon Stewart Skewers Santorum

Comedian Jon Stewart had a bit of fun on the “Daily Show” last night at Rick Santorum’s expense, noting the race for the GOP nomination is all but over in the eyes of the pundits and senior party leaders but in the candidate’s mind.

“Let’s begin tonight with the trail of victories for one Wilhelm Mittens Romsfelt,” Stewart quipped. “The man won huge. He beat Rick Santorum in Wisconsin 44 to 37 percent. He beat Rick Santorum 49 to 29 percent. He beat Rick Santorum in Washington, D.C. 70 percent and he wasn’t even on the ballot.”

And it’s now “The Last Bland Standing” to use the graphic from Stewart’s “Daily Show”, with just about anyone of any importance in the media telling the former Pennsylvania Senator to take a hike.

“[Tuesday] night, Fox took time out to cover the Razzies and CNN left the on-screen duties to John King’s understudy,” Stewart said. “For the last six months, he’s been in his dressing room just ready to zoom out, zoom in. Is John King here tonight?”

Stewart noted that Newt Gingrich, who like Santorum has publicly vowed to fight on despite rumblings behind the scenes that he bow out, didn’t even bother to have a campaign speech.

But Santorum’s primary night comments that the race has reached “halftime” and that his side would surge out the locker room in Pennsylvania and elsewhere in May earned him zingers from Stewart.

And it is beginning to look like even Pennsylvania could be a tough sell for Santorum with a recently released Public Policy Polling poll
showing Mitt Romney taking the lead in the Senator’s home state for the first time.

“Everybody but Santorum,” Stewart said. “ This is going to get ugly. Game’s over dude. It’s over! You’re done. This isn’t a scene in a sports drama where the coach gives an inspiring speech and the team comes back in the playoff.

“This is the scene in the movie where Hilary Swank hits her head … and never boxes again.”

Stewart directed particular satirical invective against Santorum’s comparison of his campaign to Ronald Reagan’s 1976 campaign against President Gerald Ford where he didn’t win any primaries until May and then took his challenge to the convention before going on to win in 1980.

“I think the point of this is if I stay in long enough I will lose, but at least I will divide my party,” Stewart said. “Santorum 2016!!! I think that’s where you are going.

“So, Santorum 1980!… No, Reagan 2012. Bleep.”

But Stewart had particular fun with Santorum’s comparison of his campaign with George Washington’s crossing the Delaware, noting that Santorum’s campaign seems in his opinion to have more in common with the Titanic than a triumphant win against Hessian soldiers in 1776.

“Do not anger Joe Scarborough,” Stewart said sullenly, responding to a clip of the MSNBC host warning that Romney will destroy Santorum in his home state and “reduce him to rubble”.

 

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